‘A real dog lover would notice the dog is stressing and immediately stop’: Self-proclaimed ‘dog lover’ tries to touch woman's anxious pup despite her warnings not to do so, family vilifies her for swatting the stranger's hand away

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  • "I get that my blocking his hand was unwanted physical contact, but so was him touching my dog."
  • "AITAH for stopping a "dog lover" from touching my dog?"

    My (46F) only pet (currently) is 7.5 lb of neuroses. She is 5 years old and has been with me since she was 8 weeks.
  • Because we live out in the country and my health isn't great, she was never really socialized so anyone new makes her extremely nervous. Or MORE nervous than she usually is.
  • On top of being isolated and anxious, she also has a seizure disorder, and her seizures are usually triggered by stress. Her vet and I have opted not
  • to medicate her yet since she only has them every few weeks or even months. They're fairly mild but each one is still difficult to watch.
  • Once a year, we make the 5+ hour trip to stay with family, and everyone has learned that she does best when they mostly ignore her and just let her
  • do her thing. Otherwise, she enjoys spending time with the two other dogs there and just investigating my mom's koi ponds and gardens.
  • We normally "warn" any visitors before they arrive so they know to just leave her alone and let her come to them.
  • On this last visit, one of my sister's friends dropped by unexpectedly. (He was a big guy, maybe early 30s?) My dog was in my lap and quiet so he didn't notice her at first.
  • As soon as he saw her, he headed our direction and she immediately climbed me like a tree. She tried to hide behind my head by draping herself
  • across the back of my shoulders, something she does when she feels threatened. Plus the barking. There's always lots of that.
  • woman holding a dog affectionately and close to her face
  • As soon as I realized he was eyeing her, I told him she's not friendly, that it can take MONTHS for her to warm up to someone new. He just grinned and reached out. He said he was a "real" dog lover, whatever that means.
  • I thought he might have the sense to offer his hand for her to sniff, but nope. He started to reach over her head and she made a growl I'd never
  • even heard from her before. She's never bitten anyone but I was worried she might since he was ignoring every warning.
  • Finally, I reached up, blocked his hand, and gently pushed it back toward him. You'd think I slapped him the way his smile dropped. He
  • wandered back to the other side of the group and I went back to the conversation he'd interrupted.
  • After I went inside for the night, a couple of people there (friends and neighbors) were talking about "my behavior" like I'd done something wrong.
  • I get that my blocking his hand was unwanted physical contact, but so was him touching my dog. Maybe I'm just sick of people seeing her
  • cuteness and ignoring anything I say, but what else could I have done? I couldn't stand or move away because she was on my shoulders. So AITAH here or was I justified?
  • Broad_Respond_2205 A real dog lover would notice the dog is stressing and immediately stop and back away. NTA
  • LaceLurks you were in the right tho, like he ignored every verbal warning and your dog was literally screaming no in dog language. people acting like dog lover means i get to ignore consent is wild fr, you just protected your anxious lil baby.

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